DISAPPEELED?

I had a psychic vision,
of being dropped down to,
once every two weeks,
I realized,
the harsh reality,
that, that's my cue.

I loved for so long,
the whole time,
I feel so foolish,
I never want to love,
ever again.
You can really be made out to feel that you have no worth.

It doesn't feel right,
at all anymore,
for me to stick around,
it's that psychic feeling,
that it is over.

If I stay alive,
into the new year,
it will be a completely,
different life.

I always lose everybody,
this has been happening,
all my life,
since a kid,
it's just the way it is.
How dare I even try to hold on.

But realizing this person never cared about me at all. What am I even doing here? It is all destroyed.
There is no way to say good-bye, this sting is unbearable.
It was all so obvious, but I was so delusional. 

Just, nobody sees any potential in me. I can sense it and see it in their eyes, in their actions, in their body languages, in their energies, I can smell it on them, and it's worse than doubt, I'm not even worth doubting.
I feel I am in enough pain to say, that it is time to move on.

BLURr