Time To Face The Music

(so I ended up picking this song, after a LONG search for a really sad soothing song, which I felt was perfect, in a very, imperfect way, that it very sad, and that maybe I am starting to feel relief after writing this blog, that I am accepting this fate, and letting go)(I hope that anyone out there feeling heart broken from this world, finds solace, it will be ok if you hold on, because you will learn to endure, and live with your, pain)
(expressing feelings helps)
But, Now, It, Is, Time to face the music
And I really don't know how to express this
Cause my heart is in rubble
And I take the pain
...and i lost her
...i will accept this GOD :( and cry. and accept. and walk on.

I don't know how to put this in order
But how much it hurts
When you fall soo in love
With someone that will never care about you
At all

And you don't even know how to let go
But you know it's coming
You have to
Time is up
You can't go on any longer

I need a REALLY sad song for this one
Because I will find out soon
Where I stand with this person
If this person cares about me at all
But I think I know what's coming

Give me a sad song
Let me know how it feels to die
And then bring me back to LIFE

Do I just fall for somebody
That will neglect me to the point
That my heart shatters

To make me feel so worthless
That I'm really just that meaningless to her
That she just there is nothing to care about
I'm not worth anything
Is the truth
And now I have to face my TRUTH

All I wanted was to let her know that she is loved
Special
Precious to me
And for her to be alright with that
And not repulsed
And that i knew nothing would happen between us
Accept that I love having her in my life
She is a ray of sunshine in my dark world

Am I even ready to face the music
I'm ready to curl up in a ball
In my bed
And CRY

I just want to walk into an empty field
And screammmmmmmm
Till this pain is
GONE :(

It's a cruel world
When you can care about someone
So much
And they just can't care about you
Because you don't got what they want

GIVE ME THE SADDEST SONG
and I will put it at the top,
and then I will go to sleep,
and cry in my bed,
in my dark room.

You can't even have someone that you care about
In your life
Slipping thru your hand like sand
As your heart implodes on it self

I need the loneliest song on the planet
to make me feel "better" right now
(i guess it's kind of funny and pathetic how hard it is for me to even find a lonely sad song)(saddest song will be at top, but some extra-sad songs that almost made the cut)

boy i feel so pathetic...

hahaha, that Janeane Garofalo gif, really just cheered me up 

But who ever is reading this, learn to hold your head up high. I know it is hard. And I am just learning now. And I've walked thru roads of hell. But I have hope that my pain is not for nothing and that I am walking toward LIGHT.

I don't think my life can get any more sadder and twisted, but maybe one day, I will find love? And I need to start making video again?