i dont want to ever feel this pain again
its too much
i don't even know how to deal with it
it hurts so bad
love feels like a mistake to ever try
i don't even know how to express properly
time will take this away
people have been my main source of pain
even a sprinkle of human interaction sometimes is to much to bare
i want out
but i want in
i want love more than anything
and GOD knows that
but the pain
i cant believe how sad one can become
i just wanted this person in my life
the realization that this person doesnt care
shattered me
and its really that i took a hammer to my glass self
because i knew this was the outcome
but i still fell for her anyway
and the fantasy was so potent
and tranceful
and now it has completely vanished
and i couldnt hold on
but this person had to do it
and i understand
but its me that has to learn to never crave that love
ever again
i just want to lift weights and punish my self
and lay in a pitch black room
frozen in the air conditioner
hugging and gripping
burying my face into the pillows
and im going to
am i a glutton for punishment
?
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